Get yourself one of these high quality, ultra-fashionable astronaut design t-shirts to impress all of your friends. The shirts have time-sensitive, entropy reversing fibers woven into the fabric so they stay perfectly clean even in dusty space conditions. In extreme situations, you can fold the astronaut head up and over your mouth to provide up to 45 mins of oxygen and hydro-nutrition particles to yourself (for emergencies only). The design and colors are acceptable in high society gatherings in 14 different cultures. Edible. 


This product is made especially for you as soon as you place an order, which is why it takes us a bit longer to deliver it to you. Making products on demand instead of in bulk helps reduce overproduction, so thank you for making thoughtful purchasing decisions!

This comfy t-shirt is made with organic, free-range Venusian Float Sheep pelt from our farms in 2612 AD. The sheep were raised and tended by a traditional 12-year-old cloud shepard using the old method of aerosurfing and gel feeding, and our talented buyers hand-pick the most luxurious pelts from the most buoyant sheep in the flock. You can trust that when you shop with Vintage Astronaut, you’re supporting sustainable farming methods from across all time. Non-potable. Do not let children under the age of 12 handle this product, extreme fire danger.

This product is made especially for you as soon as you place an order, which is why it takes us a bit longer to deliver it to you. Making products on demand instead of in bulk helps reduce overproduction, so thank you for making thoughtful purchasing decisions!

We’re gonna make you an offer you can’t refuse: the best 100% cotton tee you’ve ever tried. Pre-shrunk fabric? Check. Side-seamed construction? Check. Best fit ever? Double check.

• 100% combed and ring-spun cotton (Heather colors contain polyester)
• Fabric weight: 4.2 oz/yd² (142 g/m²)
• Pre-shrunk fabric
• Side-seamed construction
• Shoulder-to-shoulder taping
• Blank product sourced from Guatemala, Nicaragua, Mexico, Honduras, or the US

This product is made especially for you as soon as you place an order, which is why it takes us a bit longer to deliver it to you. Making products on demand instead of in bulk helps reduce overproduction, so thank you for making thoughtful purchasing decisions!